In conversation...!

There is never one reason to be troubled..

I the Chaos...one leads to another..its like displacement

The source could be anything

You wake up in the morning,
Realise the alarm didn't ring,
You got late for work,
You go for a bath,
You realise water is consumed,
So there's none left for you,
You warm the water for coffee,
You forget, the pot breaks,

You just leave unfresh,
On the way to work,
You realize u haven't worn your watch,
You forgot important papers for the meeting,
You go back

You realize you left the keys inside,
You spot some letters outside the door,
They are all for unpaid bills

u stamp ur feet...

Get into a cab

You find there is traffic,

You get even more late,
You call your boss,
Tell him honestly what happened,
He orders u to reach asap...

You try hard,
You cant do anything about it even if u run,
You light a cigarette,
The ash falls on your clothes,
There you've made a hole

So, u see there is no end to it

And this is the genesis of Chaos
And this is the genesis of Beautiful words....

BlacknWhite Chaos!

The pendulum is ticking
The left side is hemorrhaged
The right side is exploding
What is left, is the swaying

To and fro
To and fro
There's no control
The clock is ticking

Its the biological track
Or the psychological distract
No idea, am just doing the act
Life is sometimes a shit-hole

I tremble, I am shy
I fall, I want to fly
I stumble, I try
I am troubled, I dont know why..

I want to lose it all
But will is too strong
I want to end it all
But there is a desire untold

I am bashed, I am smashed
I am broken, yet I am taken
I am thrashed, I am crushed
I am stolen, yet not heart-broken

It is indeed a strange disease,
Its a bug that creeps under my sleeves
Am dramatic, not psychotic
Am determined, not yet hopeless...

So, I end with some more talking
I know you are around, yet am not stalking
I know you'll be back, my life's meaning
Just dont lose the track, keep on going...!

Friendship is made in heaven(hearts)

(By heaven I mean our hearts)

Have you ever thought why a relationship ends up in Friendship?
----The statement "we can still be friends"...
Have you ever thought about... "oh my god, what was I thinking, we are better off as friends"

Truth is, when we are in a relationship, we tend to ignore the fact that we were friends first.
We become this extremely authoritative "complaint box", or we are in this hypothetical world of "life in a trance", "life is beautiful now", "we are inseparable", "n omg we are so romantic".
We expect everything to be hunky dory, but it hardly meets our expectations.

Another way to look at it, some friends are for a short while, to fulfill a purpose, to bring a smile, and then, move on. Some disrupt our lives, and some make us experience chaos. Some polish us, some give us strength, some bring changes in us (+ve/-ve), according to that moment's need.

But the ones that stayed on through thick and thin, through storms and chaos, through love and loss, through truth and false, suffer with you, experience the highs and lows with you without complaining, without making you realize that you might be losing it, that you are too old for fun, that anything you do is wrong and is affecting them, letting you talk while they are bored, loving you even when you are long gone, even when you return without a chord, but the smile, the one day you spend venting out your inner core, connects you like you never did discord...

Such is the friendship that sticks on, even when our near and dear fail to be our own...! Such is the friendship that is beyond all. It's like an angel guarding you even when you don't know who you are.

MANANA's love is distant!....

Disruption's slowly moving away
Its time to get to rescue act
Loads of people to meet
Truckloads of information to share
Disruption is moving away
As ppl r taking d place instead
Its time to move on
But then again "fun" is not my God

The 'Godliness' in me needs some "fun"
But the 'Soul' within me needs to get a hold
I wonder then what does my heart want
Fun.Disruption.Chaos.Love or just plain simple turmoil.

My mind says "I want" "I want"
My soul says "hang on" "hang on"
Dont let d drama queen get out
Wait for it to happen on its own
It will come back
With it the reason will come back
The purpose is to take a step back
While Chaos explores itself backwards

So Disruption, while you take a step back
I struggle to get you back
I need you back
To make myself Comeback
Manana is Chaotic, but without you only Disruptive!
(In a Destructive )

Suppressed Chaos!

Just the wrong kind of day...

Have you ever woken up and felt like something might be really wrong with your life?
Well it happened to me recently.
A dream (nightmare), am still confused,

1)I never dream,
I am thoughtless usually because there is so much always on my head.
The thinking stops when am asleep
But this time...
Something seemed very very wrong

2)I felt like I was in the wrong houseY?
Because my home is somewhere else
I thought I never belonged to a particular home
But this time...Something seemed very out of place

3) Morning chocolates made me sick
My cookies tasted Sugarfree
My chocolate drink tasted pungent
I crave for chocolates all the time
But this time...Something seemed very bitter

I get to work
My hair looks undone
My regular wear attire that usually looks great, looked misfit
The smile on my face seemed force
I am a workaholic
But this time...Something seemed to control me

My innermost core was always strong
I could withstand all unfairness
I could control my emotions
I was a tough nut to crack
But this time...Something made me not myself

Evening arrives
I am switched off after one whole year
Parties seem boring
Dinner with friends a drag
Homesickness sets inI am outgoing...
But this time
Something was out of elements

I loved chaos
I like the chaotic nature of my mind
Having too much to think ticked me off
It kept me going
My imagination never ran dry
But this time...
Something was just not meant to be

I always felt wanted
I felt like I had a sense of purpose in this Disruption
But again this time...

I am lost
I am confused
I am out of myself
Out of my boots
I am beginning to get bored
Which is not me
I want to have loads to think
I want to have loads to enjoy
But there is a bug that has caught me
The bug of Distress
Disruption which is leading to a chaos that can even put my life at a full stop.

Where is the saviour in me
Where is the solace I find in Disruption
This world is beginning to get to me
And I am heading to a complete fix
A complete breakdown
I want a reason to Disrupt once more
I want a reason to be Chaotic twice more than I already had
Wheres the kick I get?
June 20, 2008 3:22 AM

Chaos Uncovered

Is it the chaos of my mind

Or the confusion of my paradise

Is it the mind that needs to get a hold

Or is it my life that needs to reflect whats the soul

I call upon the depths

To unfold what is there within

Dont suppress the inner core

Reveal the mind, and disrupt some more!

Disruptive Chaos@Rains!

When the Weather "Gods" become unstable...

There is no reason,
There is no season,
They alternate between poise and disruption,
Destruction and control
Yet so beautiful,
Yet so unique
To many, it may seem dull
To many, it may reflect
Complete hopelessness and darkness
But the beauty of the "heavenly" love is evident in this chaos!
It has no certain pace,
No certain race,
Yet the uncertainty with which it controls human mortals
Is the uncertainty the humam mortal goes within its head
A thousand storms
A thousand songs
A thousand moments
A thousand memories, so strong
All captured within a snapshot!
The splash,
the fall
The smash,
the sundrop
The dash,
the dewdrop
Droplets of love potion
In an unstable motion
Disruptive beauty all across!

Relationships+Chaos (-ve/+ve)

When happiness starts depending on someone else..
You've entered the world of Destructive Chaos...
Whether its negative or positive is the way you want to look at it
If you feel life is sad because that one person you care about doesnt seem to respond in the same way
Sorry you got your hopes too high
This Chaos happened because you called for it
You are becoming too dependentY
our life seems to revolve around Chaos!
Sadness,Depression,Dry smiles,low morale, unending longing...
results in a permanent haze
You seem to recognise yourself less n less by the day
Becoz you dont have just that one person you need most
And you end up abusing yourself in unknowing ways
But hello honey, life is nt as cliched as the saying "life is nt a bed of roses"
But look at this from the +ve side...
Let that person be a source of added happiness (which means you are happy with/out but that person gives you just another reason to smile)
That my friend is a beautiful relationship which would then lead to +ve chaos,
Disruptive chaos but the result would be a breakthrough
Be happy with/outAs a child you were happy playing whether there was any1 to play with or not
But yes friends gave you smile
Taught you that Communication is an art
A reason to realise that 2+2 and then 2+2 again leads to Chaos
Which meant more excitement
More ideas to indulge in Play
So, why ladies n gentlemen,
Love a person if it hurts
Love a person regardless of what you would get in return
Love just because you wont to love
But dont make it a reason to hurt

MANANA says it can mean anything
OR mean nothing at all
But always LIVE FOR YOURSELF first!